I'm getting the butterflies for someone again... experience tells me that trouble is ahead... Now, I don't want my question to sound cliche' but I suppose people need reassurance sometimes... that's why so many questions of this nature are asked... If I ask, I would be putting myself in an awkward situation should the answer be "no." I'm a third year college student... I'm a Philosophy Major... at an unnamed "respected" college... She is in some sort of pre-law program... I met her at this reception before going to hear a guest speaker... we were both sort of feeling out of place and ended up in the corner of room and we started talking... we are both there on scholarships - both from poorer families than the average at this college (also the only young "minorities" in the room) ok... blahblahblah... I started to like her... anyway... she also happens to be in one of my classes... and also frequents democratic party meetings. which I also sporadically attend.. I'm not asking how to follow through, but whether or not to follow through and ask her... I have had the butterflies before... and it has always ended badly... with awkward situations... and me feeling like an idiot... or worse going through the embarrassing phase of drunken depression... Should I listen to the french fries and "please try again" by ordering more french fries or should I quit playing McDonald's Monopoly... |||You only live once, so do whatever makes you happy... and doesn't kill you.... Or even if it does kill you, if you're happy enough doing it, go out in style! The only way you're going to get over the fear of messing up, or feeling like an idiot, is by convincing yourself you're not afraid, you're not stupid, you're not going to mess up. Maybe you did before, but not this time. This time you're smarter, you've had experience, you want this, you're ready for it. Seriously you're a really smart guy, and you know it. So why doubt yourself? What's the point? Only you know if she's worth it or not. And by it, I mean the effort. Suck it up!!! Of course she is.|||Well weigh it out on the scales of life and see how it works out for you. I think you should go for it, but that's only because I've felt like I haven't gone for it enough in my own life. She sounds like a good fit, a lot of things in common which is a good start.|||just start a conversation and ask her out she says no ur awkward for a day or two big deal evry1 gets rejected neways think about the rewards|||Spiders...swallow a few spiders, they'll eat the butterflies right up.|||If you have already shared a couple of moments of light conversation, the worst is over. Go to all the democratic meetings and ask her out for a coffee after the next one. After two or three more "coffee's" see where it's going. You don't need to commit until you both start to feel more comfortable in each others company. Not until you feel like moving it ahead do you need to tell her that you are nervous and have butterflies in your stomach when you have feeling for someone as special as she has become to you... Just go slow and be yourself. You seem astute and sensitive, just work on your sense of humour and confidence. (Find out if there is a Toast Masters club where you can hone your public speaking skills. It will help you to defeat social butterflies in all areas of life. Good luck and think positive. It sounds like she might need a friend too. Stay off the booze if you are no good with it. Most people do better without imbibing...

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